I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell
March 10, 2015 - 11:36 a.m.
OK another day another edition of Wise Madness. Here's some good news I can see better this morning. I'm decreasing the type size. My vision can change every day. It's sort of scary. Maybe I'll come back again to what scares me later. Now I should move on to today's idiot stories. Yes there is more than one.
After breakfast yesterday I went back to my computer and it was dark. That's OK it was probably asleep. But pressing buttons didn't wake it up. When I pressed the power button nothing happened except that the circle of light around it flashed a few times. Holding the button down did nothing. Argggh! My brand new computer didn't work. I tried to do a hard reboot but you need a screwdriver to access the battery and I don't have a screwdriver. Warren suggested it might be the power strip. I didn't think so as my space heater was working on it and I already tried moving it to another plug on the strip. Nothing worked. Before I took it in to be repaired I went to plug it in another strip. And what did I find? That somehow the power cord that connects the power supply to the outlet had become disconnected from the power supply. How the hell did that happen? I have no idea but all that was wrong was that the battery went dead. I plugged it in and everything was fine. Whew.
OK let's see if you are paying attention. Yesterday was Monday. What do I do every Monday? Right I go to therapy. I have been arriving a bit later than I like, either just on time or a few minutes late even so I tried something new. I didn't switch to the , I took the the entire way. I have been doing this for years and taking two trains has been faster as the route is more direct and there are less stops. But of late I've waited forever for the . And know what, I got there early. The downside is that's it's a longer walk even though the two trains share a station.
Even though I had two cups of coffee at home I had cobwebs in my brain so I got more coffee at Pret a Manger. Not great coffee but it did clear my head. If you read my last entry you know that I have a lot of problems now and I wanted to be sharp to discuss them. With the stopping for coffee I arrived just on time and instead of paying first I asked to be buzzed in to the inner waiting room. I waited around there playing on my phone. I waited too long. I waited 15 minutes. I wondered where the therapist was. Then it hit me. She is on vacation. I had no session yesterday. Yes I'm a total idiot. Told you I had idiot stories.
OK then I went to get my weekly bagel fix. They are half priced after 4 PM on Mondays so I buy them and freeze them. That's my bagel supply for the week. Then I was off to my PO Box in Columbus Circle. Then I came back home. I had to pay my rent. By then it was too late to go to see Caroline Spence backed by Robby Hecht at Rockwood Music Hall stage 3. I would just go see Rod Picott at 9:00. I did my usual time wasting before dinner and went to double check the time. It was 8:30. Ugh. Now did didn't have time to make dinner. I did make some sausages but that's it. That takes almost no time and there's no prep. I made great time and got to Rockwood early.
I have been fan of Rod since forever. Other than Carey. who discovered him with me I've never had other friends go with me to his shows. That's just wrong. He's one of the best singer/songwriters out there. I hear so many people that think they are songwriters but they have nothing to say. The lyrics are filler. Rod has something to say. He says they fall into three topics, welding, unemployment, and divorce, mainly divorce. Not quite true but not totally false either. He's part of the grand tradition of working class poets finding the myths not in gods and heroes but in Ford Falcons and mobile homes. He does have one happy song, Angels and Acrobats. That's the only one he acknowledges, he actually has another Circus Girl. Noticed the shared subject matter. Ironically they both remind me of lost love.
So I went in there unhappy. I didn't have my much needed therapy. I listened to a man sing some of the most unhappy songs there are. And know what? I felt better. Part was just talking to Rod. But part is hearing the songs. It isn't that listening to sad things makes me feel better. It's that listening to great art makes me feel better. I'm waging a war against mediocrity and Rod is not mediocre. Come with me next time he plays. He has a few shows coming up.
Before I went downstairs I ran into Ben Rabb. He had just gotten out of the Caroline Spence show. After I left I cut through Rockwood 2 and ran into Eliot and stayed and talked to him a bit on the street out front. While we were there Glenn and Norman showed up. They were all there to see the next show at Rockwood 2, the Mastersons. I wanted to get home and eat some more. But as I walked by Sugar Shack I saw that my pal Joe was working so I stopped in and got an amazing Reese Cup cupcake. I love that Joe gets excited when I walk in the place. I only go in when he's working.
I never made myself a potato like I planned when I got home. I had peanut butter instead. That counts as a vegetable right?
I have officially changed the seasons. I have three hooks on my door where I keep my the outerwear I wear the most often. It had been my winter coat, my parker, and a wool sweater. I put the parker and sweater in the closet and replaced them with a hoodie and my leather jacket. The coat goes next and is replaced with my spring jacket.
Oh two more idiot stories. I realized last night that I had double booked myself for Saturday night. I had to email Chris and tell him I couldn't make the Heather Lloyd/Matt Nakoa house concert. Too bad as I love those guys and I never miss Church Korner House concerts. But I hardly ever get to see the Brittany Haas 4tet.
But while talking to Chris he asked me if I was still going to the Slides of March show at Gene and Isabel's on Thursday. I thought that was on Sunday, the Ides of March. Good thing I didn't have other plans that night. Yes I am an idiot. Four idiot stories in one edition of Wise Madness. I live my life to amuse My Gentle Readers.
I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.
Memories: Not that Horrid Song - May 29, 2018
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