I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe

The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken

Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
-Bertrand Russell

What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell

2002-08-29 - 10:40 a.m.

Happiness is a warm bagel

I better update. I went to do it last night but Diaryland was down. I had great stuff to write then but I�ve forgotten it all by now.

I went to see Deni Bonet at CBGB last night. She was great as usual. It is always fun to go to CBGB, there is so much history there and most of it has never been washed off the walls or floors.

The big news is that I�m teaching three courses next semester, two sections of �Calculus for people who hate Calculus� and one of Finite Math. The bad part is that I have to teach two nights a week that will seriously interfere with my concert going and Knick games. I�m requesting that all shows on Wednesday and Thursday start after 9PM.

The Solomon Siblings both put smiles on my face recently. Lawrence said :

I spent a weekend with some of the coolest people in the world (I wish that more of them could have made it, though). and I felt comfortable with them, and I felt they were comfortable with me. that doesn't happen to me often. but it's not just comfortable - it's that everyone enjoyed being with each other. we all don't just tolerate each other, we like each other. we seek each other out. that is the best feeling in the world.

That sums up how I feel perfectly.

Look what Gella wrote in my Guestbook. Gella definitely counts.

As I�ve mentioned before I�m in a much better space now than I have been in a long time. It got me thinking of something stupid I did when I was in a much worse space. At the time I was lonely and in lots of physical pain. When I went to Fr�con 2000 I decided to see who cared if I was there. I deliberately didn�t go to talk to anyone and waited for people to come over to me. Of course no on wants to go and talk to the guy with the sad face sulking in the corner. The only people to talk to me were the people I knew would, Gella, Kim and Kris, and Kat. I wonder if it was a self-fulfilling prophecy. That or something to do with the letter �K� and Gella was an experimental error.

It is so easy to fall into the trap of making yourself even more miserable. It isn�t a case of seeing the glass as half full, it�s seeing every germ that�s ever been on the glass then drinking from it. Why do I sometimes work at being unhappy? If I knew that I could probably make a fortune helping other people not to do it. Maybe I�ll just paint bubble wrap red and print the words �Tension Sheet� on it.


I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.





Memories: Not that Horrid Song - May 29, 2018
Wise Madness is Now In Session - May 28, 2018
The NFL and the First Amendment - May 27, 2018
On The Road Again - May 26, 2018
Oliver the Three-Eyed Crow - May 25, 2018



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Horvendile 2002-08-29
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