I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
2002-02-12 - 10:33 a.m.
I wrote this entry last night but Diaryland was down so I couldn't post it till this morning.
I keep putting off writing this entry, which isn't a wise thing on my part. The longer I wait the more I'll forget.
I had another messy situation in class today. I was getting started and people were talking. I told everyone to be quiet, people still talked. I said, "that means stop talking now!" one guy went right on talking. I'm sure there is a better way of handling this but I went straight for the jugular. I told him that since he couldn't hear me say to stop talking from the back row he should move up front. He said he could hear and just didn't stop talking. I can't believe that a student can have so little respect for the teacher and so little common sense. His grade depends on me and he tells me that he doesn't care about what I say? He refused to move up front. I told him that he has two choices, to move up front or to leave the class. He started talking back and I told him that speaking was not one of his choices. He backed down and moved to the front. I hope my class doesn't hate me now, that's two days in a row I had to put my foot down. I put my best smile on (I always do actually) for the rest of the class. I'm getting into the more fun parts of the class so I hope that catches their interest. The last couple of days I've been doing the definition of the derivative and we've been computing derivatives from the definition. That can be very tedious. I actually enjoy it but I know most people don't. Now we are using the derivative rules and it seems so much easier. I'm having a hard time getting them to accept that I'm going to ask them to take the derivative using the definition on the test. It is important, you can't really understand applications if you don't know how to use the definition.
I'm always afraid I'm going to lose people when I talk about math. I done with it now so stop skimming and go back to hanging on my every word.
My father was very bad today. When my mother took him to dialysis he couldn't get out of the car or walk inside. They had to bring a wheelchair for him. When I picked him up I brought his walker, he had been getting by with just a cane. He was able to walk to the car with it and back into the house though I had to help him get up from the car and up the steps. He is going to see his internist and cardiologist this week to see if they can find what is making him so weak.
I read Shelly's and Carey's entries about the weekend and they reminded me of so much I forgot to talk about.
It is discomforting to wake up in the middle of the night and find this blob up against you. I think I can be forgiven for calling Shelly's stuffed Eeyore a slug.
For some reason I was channeling Carey for much of the weekend, I think there is still a residual effect. I miss Neal.
I think I might have to not go into detail but I had a lot of fun with Carey's sexnoses. When I was playing with them at the Gordon Center the people behind us knew we got them at the Renaissance Festival and started talking about how much fun the festival is. They kept saying things just like us all night. I wonder if I should have talked to them. They must have noticed that we were just like them too.
I proved that contrary to popular belief; I can remain silent for 20 minutes at a time when we were at dinner. Of course I turned dinner into a charades game with me as the center of attention. I did come up with the Universal Sign for Mike Clem. I wonder what the other people there thought was going on. Good thing I have friends who find it amusing when I make a public spectacle of myself.
Shelly gave Carey a pet fish that she named Oliver. Well that's what she tells other people, his full name is Oliver Sexnose, Mr. Sexnose to you.
I realize that I am actually proud of my ability to be silly. I love spontaneously making up new rituals, religions, mythologies, and false rumors. We had far too much fun thinking about the weird sexual practices that we made up for some people that we really like. It is wrong and evil but it is also gosh darn amusing. The same can be said for the outlines of a story I made up and told Carey and Shell.
I wish I had the discipline to commit my ideas to paper. I have so many story ideas that I never write out. The best I usually have the attention for is to make a webpage or two. My all-time favorite is the Batnose page of course. Let's try this. I'll make a public announcement and see if that can goad me into action. I'm going to try and write one of my short story ideas and before the year is over submit it for publication.
There was a real musical theme to the referring pages to my diary today. I had searches for Madeleine Peyroux, Richard Thompson, Marti Jones and Dixon, Arlo Guthrie, and Deni Bonet.
There wasn't a hit for the musician I thought the most about today though, Dave Van Ronk. Dave died this weekend from colon cancer. Lots of musicians die of course. George Harrison died within the last few months. This was different for me though. I've seen Dave perform many times. I've seen him in intimate venues and have talked to him after shows. I've been following him for as long as just about anybody, I first discovered him in college. He was known as a folkie but he played just as much jazz. It was just him and his amazing guitar playing. I'd take people to see him who had no interest in his kind of music and they'd walk away impressed. He just seemed so cool and so nice. It was worth the price of admission to hear him laugh. It was a laugh of pure joy; he could find a small thing so amusing that it drove away all dark thoughts. He could also sing the blues with total conviction. He sang songs about the depths of drug addiction but he would also sing children's songs. He has been part of the folk scene since the 1950s. Everyone who is anyone has slept on his couch, including a young Bob Dylan who stayed with him when he first moved to New York. He gave guitar lessons to many performers including Christine Lavin. He was known as the "Mayor of Greenwich Village" or the "Mayor of MacDougal Street" yet he lacked all pretension. If you don't know him find some of his CDs, I'd suggest his early recordings on Smithsonian records. Listen to Gambler Blues or Stacklee Then try out his CD from the 90s dedicated to all his songwriting friends, To All My Friends In Far Flung Places. It has songs by Dylan, Tom Paxton, Phil Ochs, Christine Lavin, Tom Waits, Paul Simon, Joni Mitchell, and many others.
Goodbye Dave, I'll miss you.
I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.
Memories: Not that Horrid Song - May 29, 2018
Wise Madness is Now In Session - May 28, 2018
The NFL and the First Amendment - May 27, 2018
On The Road Again - May 26, 2018
Oliver the Three-Eyed Crow - May 25, 2018
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Horvendile 2002-02-12
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