I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
January 29, 2006 - 1:18 a.m.
I was going to wait to update till tomorrow morning when I realized I forgot something very important in yesterday's entries. I am not losing my calculus 2 class! Word thinks I should say "Classes." I guess the "2" fooled it. How bad is it that I forgot to mention that? That's the old short-term/long-term reinforcement paradox. A large reward in the future is not as an effective modifier of behavior as a small reward now. Not that the Kennedys concert or my mother walking so far were small rewards. They just have less of an impact on me than keeping my class.
Today was frustrating. I found out that my sister gave my mother all the foods that were bad for her. Everything she served her was loaded with salt. There were no ill effects this time but that is luck. The doctor stressed last visit how important a low sodium diet is for my mother. She is at risk for stroke and heart failure. For reasons I'd rather not speculate on my sister does not accept this. Not only won't she listen to me about my mother's diet, she wants to give me detailed instructions on what I should be giving my mother. I decided to not fight but to just let it slide. When my sister left I threw out all the food she brought in. A woman who has to avoid salt should not be given lox and kim chee. My mother won't remember that we had it in the house and Alison won't be here for weeks, maybe not till March so she will never find out I threw it out.
The nice part of today is that I was able to stay in my room till 1 PM and not take care of my mother. That's my natural life style. Alison left at 4 so after that I was back to being in charge. I would be nice if she could stay an entire weekend once. I'd love to be able to get away someplace.
I squandered my free time and hardly got any reading done. I'll try and read as much as I can after I update tonight. I really should have finished Northanger Abbey today; the entire book is only a little over 200 pages and it is easy reading.
My fun for the day was talking to the fabliocity that is LORi. Casper Guttman would like me. He likes a man that likes to talk. Do you know where that is from?
I just looked at my notes from yesterday and found this:
Don't give up hope
stars can't be touched
I enjoy the art if note taking, writing down as little as possible to remember as much as possible. The Kennedys talked about how Dylan singing Chimes of Freedom at Clinton's inauguration fit into the hopeful spirit of the day and how that is lacking now. It shouldn't be. As man has always known there is always hope at the bottom of Pandora's box. Only in hell is all hope abandoned. Sure things aren't looking good now but they didn't look so good when Nixon was in office and war was ranging in Vietnam. They certainly didn't look good when tens of millions were dying in WWII. Things are looking positively rosy compared to the Civil War. The thing about bad times is that regression to the mean says that things will probably get better. Isn't that the essence of hope? On a related note there is a line from Lord of the Rings that I love. I wanted to quote it but I can't find it. I'm slipping. I should be able to find any quote I remember from Tolkien, Eru knows I've read it enough times. Oh well. I'll see if I remember where in the book it is by tomorrow.
I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.
Memories: Not that Horrid Song - May 29, 2018
Wise Madness is Now In Session - May 28, 2018
The NFL and the First Amendment - May 27, 2018
On The Road Again - May 26, 2018
Oliver the Three-Eyed Crow - May 25, 2018
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Horvendile January 29, 2006
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