I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity. Edgar Allen Poe
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all. - H. L. Mencken Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so -Bertrand Russell What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ... -James Branch Cabell
July 04, 2013 - 10:35 a.m. I'm writing relatively early now to distract me from other things. I don't want to think about the rest of today. There are yawning chasms where I might be wandering aimlessly through Brooklyn. Anyone have any Fourth of July plans that could include me? There is an apartment I answered an ad that I really want. It's all of three blocks from Chris and Seth's place. It's right across Greenwood Cemetery from Katherine. It's not at all a bad walk to Coco and Bruce's or Carolann and Mark's. It's right by Meg's. In other word's friends central and the very reason I want to live in Brooklyn. I talked to the owner. It sounds perfect but she couldn't show me the place. She gave me the number of a friend of her's to call. I did, got voicemail. and he didn't get back to me. Not all day Tuesday. Not on Wednesday. I got so antsy I went into the City so I could get there in reasonable amount of time if he called. I looked at an apartment near Columbia. Nice building but a six floor walkup shared with two adults and a child and no AC. I got an email about the place with the great location that I could see it today at 9:30. That's a bit difficult coming from White Plains but I was prepared to do it. I brought my computer and overnight stuff with me and asked Coco if I could spend the night. I didn't have the exact location then and didn't know it was actually right by Chris and Seth. But as I said the guy didn't call me back. I decided to head back to White Plains after looking at the apartment by Columbia. I did. Then after 11 o'clock I heard back from the guy who could show me the apartment. He can't access his voice mail. Great, why set it up then? He sent me a text asking who I was. I explained. He said I had to be there at 8:00 this morning. That meant getting up before 6:00. I didn't really want to do that, get up early, spend over two hours getting there, to spend 5 minutes looking at a place, then heading back to White Plains. Especially as I couldn't go to bed early as he was taking forever to text me back. We finally arranged for me to see the place tomorrow. Wish me luck. That's the place I want. It can be permanent. I just need to find a roommate. Anyone want to live with me in Kensington? I'm totally serious about that. The owner sounded eager so I'm thinking positive about the place. Hey, I actually wrote about what I did and though I complained it wasn't just saying how anxious I am. I think that counts as progress. Dunkin' Donuts has some new chicken sandwiches. I had one for dinner. It was pretty good. I didn't have any sweets yesterday. First time I've done that in a while. I'm pretty sure I'm still losing weight. I'm constantly shaking so burning a lot of energy. There's always a bright side. When I was in my office I got a Facebook IM from Carey. I needed that. she's been in Ireland so we couldn�t talk. We tried to go on Turntable.fm and did for a while but it stopped working. Sigh. The universe is conspiring against me. Somehow between going from the taxi to the house last night I sprained my left wrist and elbow. They both hurt quite a bit now. I didn't feel anything happen but when I opened my water bottle unscrewing the top hurt like hell. I'm not sure when, maybe 4 years ago, I broke my left elbow and sprained my left wrist when visiting Goldberry on July 4. Somehow this is her fault. I told her this morning that she hates my left arm on Independence Day. It is the fourth of July and that means I read the Declaration of Independence. I read it every year. I might be a hippie freak and a socialist Kenyan Muslim but I'm also a patriot. This country has amazing parentage. Jefferson, Franklin, Adams were remarkable people and even though the product of a committee the Declaration is inspiring. Have you sat down and read it since school? Have you ever sat down and read it. No? Do it now. Follow the link. These are the parts that seemed timely this reading. These are from the list of grievances with King George. He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good. To criticize the country is not to be unpatriotic. It is in fact essential to patriotism. I love America so I want it to be the better. I want it to live up to the ideal of a nation conceived in liberty and the proposition that all men are created equal. To that I pledge my life, my liberty, and my sacred honor. I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge: please hold me accountable.
Memories: Not that Horrid Song - May 29, 2018
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