I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell
March 05, 2017 - 12:02 p.m.
When I get up to early I end up falling back asleep and getting a later start than if I just slept later. I hate that. On the other hand, it's better than being sleepy.
I am an idiot. I say that all the time. I understand the necessity of backing claims with evidence so here is yesterday's extended idiot story.
On Friday, I told you that I was out of my meds and needed to get more. I could have made the somewhat long trip up to Harrison, where the hospital pharmacy is and then headed into the City to see Ben Sollee. I could have made it if I had gotten an early enough start but it would have been very hectic if I didn't want to pay for the MetroNorth trip all the way to Manhattan. I decided to just go up on Saturday when I had nothing else planned. I couldn't get a ride from Jane but no biggie, I can make the trip by bus and train; it takes longer but it's doable. As I said I had plenty of time. I was not stressed even when I had the maximum wait for the train, the bus just missed the previous one. It was cold but I had dressed warmly so I didn't have a problem with the wait for the bus to the hospital. I got off the bus, walked to the hospital entrance, and it was locked. It's a hospital; it can't be closed. I know they don't have groups on weekends so figured they just don't open the entrance we used for group sessions. I walked around to the outpatient entrance. That was locked too. I walked around further to the main entrance. That was open. It's a mental hospital, they can't close on weekends. I was nervous now. If outpatient is closed will the pharmacy be open? I asked at the front desk and the guard said, "Yes." Whew. I walked to it and it was open. But the pickup window was closed. There is a second window. I said, "Is anyone there?" A woman came over. I told her I was there to pick up my meds. She said I can't. she doesn't even have access to the computer with the records in it. Arrgghh. I'm an idiot. I should have checked on Friday and done what I had to do to pick it up then. All it took was a phone call to find out. This of course triggered anxiety. I used my nonmedical techniques to get it under control. I headed home. The first bus was a little late. It is supposed to get to the train station one minute before the train. It got there three minutes later. I had a half an hour wait to the next one. The previous train connected easily with the next bus. This one of course mistimes with the once an hour bus. I had a forty-minute wait. I didn't waste the time. I walked to Stop & Shop and bought some things I needed and finished right before the bus came. My pointless trip to pick up my meds took over four hours. I will just do without meds until Monday when I repeat the journey and fill the prescription. Meditation, deep breathing, and DBT will have to do till then. I feel anxious now but that's just because I'm thinking of it. I'm not sure how long it takes for the meds to get out of my system. It isn't dangerous to stop them suddenly.
Donald J. Trump@realDonaldTrump
Wouldn't you feel better about the country with those alternative tweets?
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Memories: Not that Horrid Song - May 29, 2018
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