I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
2001-02-10 - 05:26:35
Its February do you know what that means? Rating sweeps! The stunt broadcasting of Carey and I doing guest entries really paid off. Both of our ratings soared. Yesterday I was a bit more revealing about my emotions than usual. Carey said that the IGC (internet gossip community) would have a field day with it. I hope so; word of mouth advertising is the best. Tell all your friends.
OK back to normal now. OK it's me so not exactly normal. Today I got up at 5AM so I could be at WFUV at 6 AM. I got about 4 hours sleep last night but felt great. I had such a wonderful time with Carey and now I was going to do something I love. I got out of the shower and felt so clean, both physically and emotionally. I usually feel that volunteering at the station recharges my emotional batteries. They were fully charged to begin with so I was in this incredible state. When I opened the door FUV was playing Joni Mitchell's Carey. I thought that was a really good omen.
I got to the station a few minutes late but I knew that was OK. FUV is like Cheers for me, the place where everybody knows my name. I get there and everyone goes "Gordon!" I've been volunteering for about 8 years. That's longer than most of the employees have been there. I have trained about half the volunteers there on taking pledges and using the phones. I get along great with the whole staff except for one person who resents that I take liberties. I basically give myself the run of the place, which is totally OK with everyone there but one person. It bothered me for a bit when she stopped me from supervising saying we didn't need a supervisor then had someone else supervise. Someone I had previously trained of course. I felt stupid about feeling bad and just took pledges and had fun. After she left I went back to my usual running around helping everyone on the phones and socializing. I had my usual luck of course. The woman I really hit it off with was married. That never fails. I can't end it on that note though. I spent 12 hours at FUV today and loved every minute of it.
Now I can't thing of a good transition here but there is something I've wanted to write about for the last few days, the Israeli election. At first I was totally disgusted by the whole thing. Sharon is a horror. He stood by while Lebanese Militias committed a massacre in an area under his command. I've always felt that the real struggle was not between the Arabs and the Israelis but between the warmongers and those who want peace. It's like that all over the world, in Northern Ireland, India/Pakistan, etc. There are always those who in seeking an identity to so by vilifying another people. My best hope was that the Government would fall soon and he'd be replaced by Barak or Peres. Today I became more optimistic. The first thing that got me off on this strain of thought was something the president of Syria said. He said that the election proves that the Israeli People aren't interested in peace. That's wrong. It proves that they are scared and fed up and not thinking. Then I heard that Sharon is thinking of inviting members of eh Arab parties into the government. That caught my attention. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he's changed. Perhaps he can be like Begin and be the one to make peace. It's like Nixon in China. I don't think it's going to happen but it can. Things don't have to be a disaster. There are no mistakes only happy accidents. I'm sure hoping that it proves true in this case.
I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.
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Horvendile 2001-02-10
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