I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell
January 02, 2014 - 1:51 p.m.
I was exhausted last night but then couldn't sleep. My phone battery's went dead and I forgot to turn it on so the alarm didn't wake me I the morning. The upshot is I slept very late. Now I'm just starting to write that later than I usually finish. I am still going to write and post before I eat because that's the greater hunger. I have to feed the blogging bug before my stomach.
There are times I like myself. Writing that was one of them. That's entire entry worth of revelation in two sentences.
So yesterday I did get up early despite not getting to bed very late and functioned all day on four hours sleep. Now I used to do that regularly but I was stupider then. We aren't talking when I was college either I was in my forties.
Yesterday was Coco and Bruce's New Year's Day party. It started at two but I figured I wouldn't make it till hours later. That's when I've been eating breakfast. I actually left earlier than I thought I could and got there at three. I'm so happy I did was my first shift of friends left early. That was the Chicks and Roosters shift, Meg, Carolann, Mark & Felix, Karyn & Claude, Aviv, and Miah & Pam. The last two are not Chicks or Roosters but Miah is so musically promiscuous that he's part of every musical community.
I was a bad partygoer. I hung out with my friends instead of mingling with new people. My excuse is that I have not been hanging out with them as often as usual. Then the music started, unfortunately Carolann, Mark, and Felix had to leave and couldn't join in. Guess who took pictures.
Miah and Meg
Katherine arrived as the first music shift was breaking up. After a while just talking She and Dawn got out their Ukes and started jamming. This evolved into a sing-along.
I was the trend setter, I took out my phone to look up lyrics and soon everybody did. I love that, the blend of old and new. We were making our own music not passively listening, something we think of as something that was done in the olden days, but we were added by modern technology. One of the best things in my life is that I get to take part in things like this. Even though I have no musical talent I am no longer shy about singing along. It helps that my musician friends encourage me. If I don't offend their ears I'm not afraid of offending others. And I'm pretty good at thinking of songs to sing. After we had done that for a while Jean came in and joined us on the piano. The last time I sang at a party was at Jean's Christmas party last week. By this point I was so busy singing that I forgot to take a picture of her. And in a sense that's a good thing. I was in the moment, not observing the moment. Except of course I'm always observing and always writing Wise Madness in my head.
Look at the pictures. Doesn't Coco and Bruce's house look like Christmas. You keep expecting Andy Williams and Perry Como to come out. I'm pretty sure that Bing Crosby and David Bowie came by and sang Little Drummer Boy. Coco said that she believes in starting the year doing the things you want to spend the year doing. And that's what we did, made music with friends. There are a lot of problems in the world. I often write about them. I often write about my problems. But any universe that has making music with friends is doing something right. Thank you Coco and Bruce. You're doing something right too.
The party broke up but I got a bit of an extension of the fun walking and riding the subway with Jean and Katherine. There is no music I prefer to the The End of the World Show and Bobtown and I get to call Jean and Katherine friends. They'll even admit to having me as a friend. It's a strange and beautiful world. We were joined on the walk by Abe. I know him from First Acoustics. We lost him when discussing hair styling aids. He must not have the experience hanging out with girl bands that I do. Either that or he just wanted to turn down the street where he lives.
Can you see that I'm happier now? I'm not sure that it comes out in the writing. Even when I'm feeling bad writing lets me see the exquisite wonderfulness. It's my sigil. If you have no idea what I'm talking about read the third quote at the top. In any event after some rough sledding I'm in the Festivus spirit. I wish I had a sled, it's going to snow and I'd love to used it Prospect Park. you know I'll be there on Saturday, maybe Friday too if the storm isn't too bad. One way or another I am going to play in the snow.
Brother Brothers in Arms - October 01, 2017
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