I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell
May 24, 2017 - 11:58 a.m.
I have things to do. Why did you let me wait so long to start writing? Yes, you. It's time to take responsibility for your actions. Intellectually I know that when I have a lot to do I have to start doing them but the anxiety looks ahead and says, "You won't be able to do it all and you don't want to face that." It is very easy to say, "don't listen to your anxiety, it makes no sense." It's very difficult to get yourself to do that. I have techniques to combat the anxiety; I'd be far happier if I didn't need them. Now to focus on writing. I have happy things to write about.
I went to the Met game yesterday. There are few things happier than going to a Met game. I used to go to over 20 games a season. Some seasons over 40. I very much miss that. I went to one game last year; Harvey was pitching. He had been doing terribly but I went and he pitched great and the Mets won. I credited myself. It was like Field of Dreams; the Dark Knight looked up in the stands and saw me and was inspired. This season Harvey is once again pitching terribly. I was confident I could work my magic and turn him around.
Jane and Bernie got the tickets from the Facebook Mets Talk group that we are members of. They cost only $10. I got spoiled growing up in Queens where it's so easy to get to Shea then Citi Field from. It's not so easy from Brooklyn or City Island. Yesterday was easy because we got a ride from Jane and Bernie's friends Patricia and Bob. Yes, I'm showing off I remember their names. It took an hour but it was rush how so that's not too bad. Bob knew how to navigate the streets and avoid the traffic on the Hutch.
When we got in I split off from the party as I wanted to get my free soda from the Designated Driver program. That's tradition as is buy a Nathan's frank and French fries. They have all this great food at the stadium now but I'm with Humphrey Bogart; "A hot dog at a baseball game beats a filet mignon at the Ritz."
I found my seat before the national anthem. It was sung by the students of P.S. 46. That's where my sisters went. It's in Oakland Gardens. We grew up calling it Bayside but the post office disagrees. No matter, these were my homies. I messaged my sisters to tell them. The stars were aligned, the omens were auspicious. Would my magic hold?
Harvey took the mound. Sure, I was in row 13 of the upper deck but Harvey looked up at me and felt his confidence surge. He struck out the first man. He retired the second on an infield pop. The third hit a fly to left but it was an easy out. I was disappointed that a Padre got a ball out of the infield but I can't expect perfection.
Then the Mets took the field. The Mets bets hitter, their best power hitter, Michael Conforto bats leadoff. That's not optimal as there is no one on base for him. He hit a home run, that is optimal. Then Reyes singled, Bruce singled, Walker singled. And so it goes. The Padres starter Jhoulys Chacin went through the lineup and was only able to retire two batters, Granderson who hit a sac fly and Harvey. Conforto was up again. This time there were runners on second and third; he got a single and drove them in. That was it for Chacin. After one inning Conforto was 2–2 with a home run and two rbis. That's a good line for an entire game. After one inning, the Mets were winning 7–0
Harvey sat a long time while the Mets batted around. He lost his sharpness and faltered in the second; he gave up two runs. He looked up at me and regained his form. The Mets still had a five-run lead; My magic was still working. Harvey gave up no runs in the third and fourth and Conforto came up in the bottom of the inning. He is the Mets' Mr. Excitement. You pay extra attention when he comes to bat. Good thing. He hit another home run. After four innings, his line was 3–3 with a home run and four rbis. That's not a bad week.
After a scoreless fifth the Mets removed Harvey; he had thrown 103 pitches. It wasn't a gem but it was good and enough to win. The final score was 9–3. The Mets have been doing poorly. I go and the look like champions. I think they should pay me to go to every home game that Harvey pitches. I'll do it for the major league minimum salary, $535,000 a year. It would be pro-rated of course as I'd be a mid-season call-up. I could argue that I should make as much as Harvey but I'm not greedy. Of course, if they want me to go on road trips I would expect considerably more money. And I get Falcon Ridge off.
The ride home was much faster. I got home around the same time I'd get home when I lived in Queens and took public transit. The day was a win. I got to see a baseball game, I sat with friends, I ate Nathan's hot dogs and fries, and the Mets won. Put a circle around it. This was a happy recap.
Now to eat then get things done.
Dylan and Warwick, not Dionne - May 29, 2017
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