I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe

The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken

Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
-Bertrand Russell

What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell

September 17, 2014 - 11:19 a.m.

Lord of the Networks

I hardly slept last night. It wasn't from emotional stuff but from not buying breathing strips. I find it hard to sleep when I can't breathe. It gets more pronounced when I lie down too. You have today's excuse for not writing well. I could use the all purpose "I'm an idiot."

I had a back and forth day yesterday. Heather wanted cable internet and got the package with TV. I don't use my TV so I lent it to her. That mean taking over there on the bus. I had a very curious driver who asked about it. Then he whistled why he drove. That doesn't happen every day. Good thing there are flat screen TVS or I'd never had gotten it to her apartment. Even if I took her cab getting it up her stairs would have been too hard for me. I have trouble getting up her tiny stairs when I am not carrying anything.

Time Warner said the guy would get there between 4 and 5. Much better than when I used them and it was 8-12 or 12-6. That is the benefit o them having to compete with FioS. The guy came around 4:15 and she got a call before he arrived. Then the problems began. Not with Hector, the cable guy, but the electrician that wired the place. the cable wires weren't live. Hector had to go outside and hunt for the connections. There were wired connected to nothing. He finally figured something out. It took over 2 hours. Heather had to leave for an appointment at 6:00 so I stayed. I thought I'd be late for my concert but I just made it. But Hector was great. I give him lots of credit. I told him that he's a mensch.

Then I was off to Rockwood Music Hall to see The Lords of Liechtenstein. I told Gene to save me a seat. I left at 6:35 and got there at 6:55 not bad at all. Williamsburg is convenient for Manhattan, just not Brooklyn

I sat with Gene and Linda was at the next table Dan and Noah's parents were there. Now I know Erin, Dan's girlfriend was there as he had to keep saying, "All these songs about bad relationships aren't about my current girlfriend." But I didn't see Erin. Rockwood is Dark and I was distracted.

They did new songs which is always exciting. Now I said I wasn't going to analyze musicians as much but I will point out my favorite theme. There's a reason to listen to them. They aren't saying what everyone else is saying. They have genius and I'll take that over just about anything.

After the show we went to eat at Georgia BBQ but we couldn't get a seat so we went to Katz's. I had a piece of stuckel which is redundant as stuckel means piece. It's a knobblewurst on rye. I had fries and a drink. OK everyone what was the drink? Yes a Doctor Brown's cream soda.

I got a message from Heather. She couldn't get the WiFi to work so I headed back there. For her I'm the geek-in-law. I have my geek-in-laws I go to for help. I didn't need them. I can set up a home network. Hector left a sheet with the IP address of the router. We connected Heather's computer through the Ethernet and I changed the password to something of her choosing. she probably mistyped the long random password. Once I did that everything worked. Well except that the cable box guide and menus. All we can do is scroll up and down channels.

After that I headed home on the bus. I never got to the drugstore so I never got the nasal strips so I didn't sleep. I have to take care of that today.

So here's the thing. I had a fun but not exceptional day but I wasn't depressed. I think I am over the hump. My life still sucks but I'm being a cheerful Hobbit. and with some great timing when I couldn't sleep I got to the part of LOTR where the ring is destroyed. That seems appropriate. How far can you walk in a forest? Halfway after than you are walking out. I'm walking out now. There are times it will still hit me but it won't be my default condition. I have bouts of depression but it's not my baseline state. To use my fake Falcon Ridge scenario, even if I can't go to Falcon Ridge I can be happy. But that doesnt mean I won't have a big hole in my life. Remember that the FRFF part is fake. I'm going to Falcon Ridge.

I think with that I don't have to keep giving mental health reports. I'll let you know if things change.






Annoying People - September 03, 2016
This Play Was The Pits - September 02, 2016
Banking on Getting Better or Avoiding Katastrophe. - September 01, 2016
Unlike Gilligan I Got Off the Island - August 31, 2016
Call of the Wilder - August 30, 2016




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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License. Horvendile September 17, 2014
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