I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
April 30, 2015 - 12:06 p.m.
Once again I didn't do anything yesterday. This is getting bad. Beating myself up does not help. I'll just have to figure out what to write.
Today is my and Carey.'s 15th anniversary. No we aren't married. It isn't of the date we met online or the date in person. April 30, 2000 is the day we proved that we were insane in the same way. We knew before this but this is when we proved it. I drove from Bayside to Baltimore (that's a song title) to pick her up to drive her to see Moxy Früvous in Allentown. I have written about this the last two years so I won't go into detail. You can read about it here and here. What makes it our anniversary is that it was our first adventure. We even hid from her parents. Do they know now?
I did not have as exciting a day yesterday. I did make a dinner of dishes I invented. I had sweet garlic ham steak and cinnamon roasted plantains. It w as my first time making the ham and it did not come out as well as I wanted. When I put the sweet garlic sauce on the chicken I cook it at 450°. I looked up how to cook ham steak and it said 350°. I tried 375°. That is not hot enough to char the garlic. I'll have to work on this.
I finally watched a serious film, 12 Years a Slave. Now that's filmmaking. Much of what goes on in the country today can be traced back to those times. It dealt with morality but didn't moralize. There were so many shades to the evil. The people that kidnapped him were greedy. His second owner and the taskmaster of the first owner were brutal and sadistic. The second owner's wife took out the pain and humiliation her husband heaped on her on the slaves. The first owner was kind but not a hero. He cared but not enough to make a financial sacrifice. And was Solomon wrong for abandoning Patsy to her fate? This was a film that grabbed your attention, held it, and made you think. You can't ask more.
Now for something completely different. I'm about to found a religion. This is in fact the first paragraph of the sacred text.
God existed for eons? Eternity? Picoseconds? Alone. There was nothing but God. Can you imagine how maddening that is? So God made imagined more. He imagined a physical universe. He didn't create the universe. He is the universe. There is nothing but God and his thoughts. This was God toying with himself. Every electron, quark, photon, and dark matter and energy is a part of God. God imagined a universe that would evolve. Some parts of it evolved into life. Each living thing is a part of God and when it dies it returns to whole. Some parts evolved intelligence. This was even more amusing to God. Now parts of God have someone to talk to. Then when they die and return to the Whole the Whole can begin to understand interpersonal relations. Before this there was not as there was only one person. There couldn't be an inter.
Again don't forget God did not create man. God is everything. Every person on every planet is a part of God no more or less than any other person. God does not speak to people except as people speaking to people. It would be like a person talking to part of her brain. There was no talking till God was divided into parts.
God does not get a pronoun. There is no need for pronouns. God is unique. God does not need a name. As long as we didn't know the sun was a star it didn't need a name. It was the sun. It still is not capitalized and treated as a name. So I guess I shouldn't capitalize God either. But God won't mind that I did. God is not a he or a she. That's silly. God does not sexually reproduce. What would it mean to say god was male or female? Do we say an ameba is male or female?
God does not give us morality. There was no morality or a need for morality or ethics before there were people. When there was just God who was there to be moral or immoral to? No one. So God knows nothing of morality. He doesn't even know that murder is wrong for there was no on to murder. The parts of God that are intelligent have to work these things out for themselves. The closest thing to the will of God is a consensus of the parts of God. They don't often form a consensus. The closest thing is that as each part is as divine as every other part they expect to be treated the same. So each person should treat every other person the way he or she wishes to be treated. All the groups of parts of God on earth seem to have come up with that rule with just differences in phrasing.
God is not love. God before the divide did not know of love. There was no one to love but God so love by God would be narcissism. The pieces can love each other and often do. This is part of what God got out of the division. God's experiences multiplied exponentially not God could know love and hate and kindness and cruelty.
.There's no point to worshipping God as that would be narcissism too. But people like to get together so churches can be formed. There will not be religious laws as each member of the church is as much God as each other member. There can be suggestions on how people should live but that's not going to come from the sacred text. People will have to come up with that themselves. They can do a good job of that when they don't put off the responsibility on what somebody else said. Nothing is write or wrong because some person or book says it is so. There are no prophets. God does not talk to people. God does not come amongst people except as the parts of God that are people.
Where did God come from? I don't know. Maybe he's just a part of a bigger God who is part of a yet bigger god ad infinitum. There's no way of knowing.
Oh the name of the religion? Holism as the basic tenant is that God is all and all is God.
OK what was that all about? Do I believe in a word of that? No. But it's how I approach religion. Just as I try to determine a possible origin of orcs in LOTR I try to work out the details of a world with God would be like. So in a world where Ged actually existed it bothers me that I never read or hear of other people questioning why god created the world. Why he makes the rules he made. One of the basic questions of physics is "why is there something instead of nothing." I don't hear people questioning that about God. I'm sure some have but it is in no way a common topic of discussion. So I sat down and tried to come up with some kind of self-consistent world with a god in it. It actually came out of some Platonist thoughts I had about the question of why there is something instead of nothing. What if there isn't anything but there are internally consistent laws of nature, an equation to describe everything? And what if part of that equation is people that wonder "why is there something instead of nothing." It's sort of like a computer simulation without a computer. It's just inherent in the math. Pretty sure that's nonsense, but it's fun nonsense.
So I don't want to start a religion but if you want to follow it I think you'll do better than most religions do at the morality at any rate. It would still be based on a lie of course which is why I won't be any part of it.
I will be part of celebrating my anniversary with Carey. Happy Anniversary my beloved brain.
I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.
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Horvendile April 30, 2015
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