I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe

The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken

Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
-Bertrand Russell

What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell

March 19, 2013 - 12:38 p.m.

Bonding Through Dislike

I have hardly done anything since I last wrote. I finished the bus trip to New York. It was a bit comfortable after I put my computer away. It forced my arm into the position where the elbow of the guy next to me dug into it,. I pretty much slept and listened to music the rest of the time. Oh right there is an idiot story. My plan was to race to the WfUV studio to see John Platt interview Barnaby Brightas soon as I got in. We got in a bit late and as I got to the subway I went to use google maps to find when I could be expected to get there before it started. I didn't want to come in an explain to the engineer and or producers what I was doing there. The odds were good I'd know them but I wasn't sure. I reached for my phone and it wasn't there. I checked my jacket pockets and it wasn't there. I figured it fell out somehow as I got ready to get off the bus. I ran back to the bus and was relieved that it hadn't left yet. I told the driver what happened and he opened the door. I went to my seat. The phone wasn't there! I started to think of what I needed to do if my phone was gone. Then I remembered. I had my phone in my shirt breast pocket when I listened to music. I felt. it was still there. Have I mentioned that I'm an idiot.

I checked the travel time and saw I'd probably be late. And I certainly wouldnt have time to eat and the adventure with the phone emotionally tired me so I decided to not go. It would have been a major schlep and a bigger schlep home. So instead I ate my therapy meal at Nathan's. Oh yes. my therapy was canceled because my therapist's mother died on Sunday. Then I took the subway home and treated myself to chocolate blackout cake and coffee at Connecticut Muffin.

I got home, took a shower, got into my sweats and planned on spending the rest of the day resting in bed. I played on the computer and best of all played on turntable.fm with Carey. There is something to be said for being warm and snuggly in bed and talking to a friend.

Things went great till I started having an anxiety attack. as I was about to go to sleep. I had to decided whether it was best to try and sleep and get over it that way or do something else. I posted about ti on facebook and got input from friends. The input itself helped Then I self medicated by watching "Buffy the Vampire Slayer." It was the Xander and the mean kids being possessed by hyenas episode. "When they build a new school they get the desks and chairs and the mean kids." It helped. By the time it was over I was ready for sleep. I started looking for something on my blog and in the process found something totally unrelated, the blog about one of the best weekends I had, I can't get anything done 'cause I'm having too much fun . I saw Tom Landa and the Paperboys, then Carey came and we say Slaid Cleaves and Mary Gauthier one day and Deni Bonet the next and volunteered at WFUV. Most importantly we busked in Washington Square Park. You know you need to read about that. It drove away the last of the anxiety. That was such a good time.

Wow I wrote all that and thought I had nothing to write about. That's good because I don't think I actually have much to say about what I planned on writing. This is one of those things that I couldn't write about immediately as it is about people and I don't want anyone to know who they were. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

So you know how you can bond someone of shared love of something? You can also bond over shared antipathy, especially of a people. I have to know someone well before I'll talk about not liking someone, well unless they really deserve it. It feels so good to hear that the person you are talking to doesn't like them either, You think, "OK I'm not terrible, that person really is mean or creepy or annoying or whatever it is you don't like. If you thought your friend did like the person and find out he or she doesn't you feel relieved. "Whew she doesn't have the terrible taste in people I thought she had."

I tried writing this rest of this without using names and got caught in a sea of pronouns. It is hard to follow things like "I'm so glad she doesn't like her." So I'm going to make up names for people in alphabetical order.

That's what got me wanting to write about this. I told Aphrodite how I was mistreated by Artimis. Aphrodite said, "I'm not surprised." she didn't like him either. My opinion of Aphrodite went up. It made me feel better as there's always the "If she likes that creep what does it mean that she also likes me.

I couldn't write about that here but I had to get it out of my system so I told a Dionysus who I can trust with these sorts of things and his response was. "I'm so glad Aphrodite doesn't like her. I thought they were close. I'm relieved that they arent."

Just went I thought enough time and gone by that I could write about it here something similar happened and I wanted to add that to the story. I told Dionysus that I didn't Hephaestus. He said, "that's so funny I was just talking to Hestia about how we don't like Hephaestus.

I just picked the names in the order they appeared in a list of Greek gods and the way it worked out the people I liked got the names of Gods I don't like and visa versa.

I should make a list of things I need to let sit before I write about them so I don't forget. Of course this way you have no idea when these events took place so you can't figure out who I am talking about.

It's late I better make breakfast. It's spring break but I want to go to school today to do some preparation and pick up my mail. I guess I should wait till later as I am going into the city tonight to see Jean Rohe and parts of Matt Turk's and Caitlin Canty's shows. There is overlap of the times.

Brother Brothers in Arms - October 01, 2017
Late to Bed and Late to Rise - September 30, 2017
On Your Feet or On Your Knees - September 29, 2017
Why Life Doesn't End on Closing Day - September 28, 2017
Anna and King of I Am - September 27, 2017

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Horvendile March 19, 2013
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