I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
Edgar Allen Poe

The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
- H. L. Mencken

Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
-Bertrand Russell

What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
-James Branch Cabell

March 05, 2015 - 12:04 p.m.

That Doea Not Compute ... But This Does

OK I am writing this on the new version of Word and of course I hate it. I will adjust. So the exciting thing is that I have a new computer. My first entry written on it will be the exciting tale of my getting a new computer.

As you know I've been MIA for days. My old computer died. It was a zombie and kept coming back to life but then I could no longer resuscitate it. Not blogging is not good for my mental health which has been taking a beating in any event. On Monday I had therapy. Now I was going to buy a computer right after therapy at the nearby Staples at Union Square but I had plans for the evening. First I was going to Heather's then to see Jason Trachtenburg's new musical. Damn I have to get up and get my program to get the title exactly right. Just hold on and amuse yourself. I'll be right back. I didn't have to do that. I remembered the title, Dr. Goldheart. I thought there might be more. But in any event it wasn't far from Heather's at Bushwick Burlesque. I am going to have to figure out how to do macros on this damn thing. OK I'm not going to find their URL you can look it up if you want. I'm keeping this simple. And that's not my point. I'm writing about my computer and nothing else.

Anyway I wasn't going to carry a new computer to a show so I held off for a day. Of course there is more though because as you know I'm an idiot. I got to Heather's and checked on Facebook how to get to the show. And when I looked at “today's events” it wasn't there. Know why? It was on “tomorrow's events.” I told you I'm an idiot. I had the day wrong. Ugh. I should have bought the computer.

OK so I hung out at Heather's longer then headed home. So fine on Tuesday I'd buy the computer for sure. Now of course I have a lot of anxiety about buying the computer. It's spending money which I am short of. But it is my lifeline to the world. It is where I blog .It is my music player. It is my TV set. I use my phone but it is harder. I need a real computer with a keyboard. So I decided to keep it simple. I would try Best Buy and Staples in Brooklyn. They aren't that far from each other. I go to Best Buy and found something adequate but not quite what I wanted. I headed to Staples and was much happier. I found what I wanted, a Toshiba Satellite with a big rebate. I bite the bullet and go to check out. And and and, … when I run my debit card I get a message, "use another form of payment." Ugh. I knew I had the money. What happened? I had all these fears of money coming out of my account without my knowledge. My anxiety skyrocketed. I canceled the sale and went home. I was going to see Carolann the next day and I'd deal with it with her around to pick up my emotional pieces.

So on Wednesday I got to meet her at the Library as we always do for our weekly get my life in order session. With her around for moral support I checked my account on my phone app. Shockingly I remembered the password. I had the money. Just what I thought I had. Why the hell was it declined? I called my bank using the number on the back of the card. There was a number to talk to "a real live person" I called it. I got all sorts of automated menus. Ugh. Finally I hit "0" and got to talk to a person. I asked what happened. He said I put in the wrong PIN. My first reaction was that was impossible .I know my PIN and entered it twice. Now in the process of the automated menus I had to set up a phone PIN. I put in the same one … but it wasn’t. Duh. I realized I used my old PIN but I changed it around a year ago. How did I forget that? Come on you know the answer, I'm an idiot. That and I was so stressed. OK so now I had money and could buy the new computer.

My first stop was my PO Box then I went to my office. e to get my copy of MS Office 2007. I thought it might be in my box of stuff. I found it. Then I headed to Staples. I checked on my phone and there was one just a few blocks away at 57th and Broadway. My school is at 61st and Broadway. I get there and see that it's just a Staples Copy Store. Ugh. But then I remembered that there's a regular Staples over on 7th Ave. I used to go there often for chalk and dry erase markers. I went there. They were gone. Ugh. I went back to the Staples Copy Center and asked where the closest Staples was. He told me 48th and Eighth Avenue. So I walked over to there with a stop and Steak 'nShake. I needed something to shore up my strength. I made a bad choice, a Reese Cup shake. It was vanilla! How stupid is that? OK I had that then moved on to the Staples. They didn't have the computer I wanted. The sales guy told me to go to the store at 39th and 5th. There is a lot of walking in this story.

I went to the new store and immediately found the computer I wanted. Huzzah. It took me a while to get a sales person. I did. And and and … the computer was out of stock. Ugh! Did I crumble? Did I give up? Did I do the hokey pokey and turn myself about? No this intrepid young man, OK not that young, Ok OK no that intrepid. But I am a man. And I asked if he could look up if the Union Square store had it. They did! Yes the store I should have bought it at on Monday. This time I hopped on the subway and went down there. I didn't see the computer. I asked about it. I knew they had four of them. They did it was just that the price on the computer was wrong and I was searching by price. I didn't know the model number. There were some negotiating about the protection package. I bought one I never buy one but I was so burned last time I couldn’t face it happening again. If this computer gets dropped I'm getting it replaced. So I got my computer and headed home. Ahhh. Oh and there is a $250 rebate. That's why I got this one.

So of course I had anxiety about setting it up. So of course I put it off. I wasted time for a while then made dinner. That was good, Jerk/garlic chicken and roasted potatoes. Aren't you glad I got some food in? I know you’ve missed reading about what I eat.

Finally I got it out of the box and followed the setup. It took a long time to set up. Then I had to start figuring out Windows 8. I'm getting the hang of it and see that I don't have to deal with those ridiculous tiles that I am not sure you can order. I never saw it on Heather's but there's still a taskbar where you can pin the programs you use often.
Paul sent me to a website where I could download the programs I need. That took a long time. But now I have Firefox and a ton of other things I use. By the time all that was done it was too late to set up Word and blog.

As soon as I started to set up the new computer I hoped against hope and moved the old one to my table and plugged it in to see if I could revive it again. No such luck. I went to bed. But then …. I got up to go to the bathroom. What did I see? But the little light on the old computer that said it was charging. IT'S ALIVE! I thought quickly. The trick was to not move it. I logged on. It started to move the files I wanted to drop box.. I had started that when it died the last one. Then I went to synch firefox. It worked. My new computer has all the bookmarks and passwords from my old one! That's the one thing that worked great.

This morning I went to install Office. First problem I couldn't open the optical drive. If finally did by using the eject button on media player but that can't be the only way to do it. Anyway I put in the CD. I ran the install and … and … and .. It wasn't the Office Disk. It's Word Communicator. I have no idea what that does. So I then went to my installed apps and used the copy of Office 365 that comes on the computer. But of course it doesn't really come with it. It just links to the website where you can pay for it for a year. But there is a free one month option and I went for that. It's how I’m writing this
This morning I set up media player so it can play WFUV and WQXR including Operavore. Some things are different and I had to figure out workarounds. I did.

OK now to see if I can post this and make breakfast. Wish me luck. On the posting not the breakfast. Oh I'll tell you what I'm planning on making, grits ala Gordon.. I need to find a place I can buy cheese curds so I can make poutine grits.





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Anna and King of I Am - September 27, 2017



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Horvendile March 05, 2015
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