I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity.
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so
What I have been telling you, from alpha to omega, what is the one great thing the sigil taught me — that everything in life is miraculous. For the sigil taught me that it rests within the power of each of us to awaken at will from a dragging nightmare of life made up of unimportant tasks and tedious useless little habits, to see life as it really is, and to rejoice in its exquisite wonderfulness. If the sigil were proved to be the top of a tomato-can, it would not alter that big fact, nor my fixed faith. No Harrowby, the common names we call things by do not matter — except to show how very dull we are ...
2002-04-24 - 10:28 a.m.
I have things that must get done before school today so what am I doing? Updating of course. I'm addicted to Diaryland, like an addict.
Yesterday I was back to taking care of transferring property to my parent's name to my mother's and mine. We went to my mother's friend, a lawyer who told me how to make out a new deed to the house. I bought a form but I wish I could find one I could do on the computer. I'm going to actually have to take my typewriter out of mothballs if I can't find one. With my typing it is going to take me more than one shot to get it right.
After that we went to Merrill Lynch to transfer the account there. Now lots of the family assets are in my name. It's a good thing my sisters trust me. I know that when my mother dies we won't fight over money at all. We will fight over little sentimental things. My father was able to get a second Bronze Star, that was good. I have one and so does my nephew.
Today after teaching I'm going to play bridge with Roy. One of the things I have to do this morning is call him to confirm. I haven't played bridge in forever. I hope I remember how.
People always comment on how Carey and I have adventures. Somehow when we write about what we do it comes out sounding exciting. It actually is exciting to us but I wonder if anyone else would think so if they were doing them. We had a great time standing in the rain singing silly songs, when I put it like that does it sound exciting though? It's all about attitude. Something is an adventure if you think of it as one. I live a fairly mundane life, so I try to spice it up by getting as much as possible out of what I do. I'm lucky enough to have found friends who feel the same way. Real adventures tend to be not pleasant when you are actually experiencing them anyway. There is a great passage in Lord of the Rings out it.
The brave things in old tales and songs, Mr. Frodo: adventures, as I used to call them. I used to think that they were things the wonderful folk of the stories went out and looked for, because they wanted them, because they were exciting and life was a bit dull, a kind of sport, as you might say. But that's not the way of it with tales that really mattered, or the ones that stay in the mind. Folk seem to have just landed in them, usually - their paths were laid that way, as you put it. But I expect they had lots of chances, like us of turning back, only they didn't. And if they had, we shouldn't know, because they'd have been forgotten. We hear about those as just went on - and not all to a good end, mind you; at least not to what folk inside a story and not outside it call a good end.
I'm probably better off not having that kind of adventure. I've been lucky enough to find some friends who can make the simple things seem like adventures. The thing that inspired Carey and me busking was that people found our enjoyment of each other contagious. I can feel like that when I'm by myself but it is better with somebody else.
I guess the whole point of this is that how you feel is up to you. You make a conscious decision. You can see yourself as standing in the rain acting foolish or you can see yourself as following in the ancient traditions of the Commedia del'Arte. It's your call.
I signed the Pro-Truth Pledge:
please hold me accountable.
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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License.
Horvendile 2002-04-24
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